Miss Louisa closed her book with a bang and looked around at us with a big smile, as she always did when she finished reading. I looked back at her, beaming. I was tremendously proud of her. She had turned in a magnificent performance. She had brought it off so smoothly, apparently effortlessly, without hesitation. I clapped my little hands together and said “Yay! Yay!” as if she’d just set a new record for the high jump.
I was the only one clapping. I looked around at my fellow pupils and I discovered that they, for some reason, were beginning to blubber. Matthew, however, was not. He sat there in Miss Emily’s lap nodding his head, his mouth twisted into that sneering grin.
Miss Louisa’s face fell. Miss Emily looked terrified. She began gathering children to her bosom. “It’s all right,” she repeated as she ran around the circle trying to give a hug to each of them. “It’s only a story.”
“It’s not just a story.” said Matthew. “It’s the truth.” His voice surprised everyone. We all looked at him, and the other children stopped crying. “I heard another story about the fox and the clam,” he said, “and it was just as bad.”
“I know a different story about the fox and the clam, too!” I said, smiling again, thinking that I might get a chance to tell my version.
Matthew looked straight at me. “How come you’re always smiling, Peter?” he asked.
I stopped smiling. I thought about the question, but I couldn’t think of an answer. I looked at Matthew, and then I looked around at the other boys and girls, at Miss Louisa and Miss Emily. They were all looking at me, waiting for an answer. None of them was smiling. I began to feel empty, stupid, and sad.
“I’m not always smiling,” I said, and I wasn’t.
The mothers and fathers began arriving. One by one their children ran to them, weeping, inconsolable. When my mother arrived, I ran to her at once and took her hand and started tugging her toward the car. When we were nearly there, I turned back to look at Matthew. He was staring at me, and after a moment he stuck his tongue out at me. He looked so silly with his red tongue sticking out of his white face that I couldn’t help myself. I laughed.
Have you missed an episode or two or several?
You can begin reading at the beginning or you can catch up by visiting the archive or consulting the index to the Topical Guide.
You can listen to the episodes on the Personal History podcast. Begin at the beginning or scroll through the episodes to find what you’ve missed.
At Apple Books you can download free eBooks of “My Mother Takes a Tumble,” “Do Clams Bite?,” “Life on the Bolotomy,” “The Static of the Spheres,” “The Fox and the Clam,” and “The Girl with the White Fur Muff,” the first six novellas in Little Follies.
You’ll find an overview of the entire work in An Introduction to The Personal History, Adventures, Experiences & Observations of Peter Leroy. It’s a pdf document.
Share this post