266: When he got . . .
Herb ’n’ Lorna, Chapter 5 continues
WHEN HE GOT the news, he ran to his Uncle Ben’s and burst into the apartment shouting, “Uncle Ben, I’ve been drafted!”
“Oh, Herb!” cried his Aunt Louise. “Oh, your poor mother.”
“I know,” said Herb. “That’s what I’m worried about. But I’ve got it all worked out, Uncle Ben.”
Ben put his fork down and looked at Herb thoughtfully. He assumed that Herb was going to try to get him to support Lester and Millie while he was in the army, or even — God forbid — try to make him agree to support them forever if Herb were killed. “Now, Herb,” said Ben, “you know I’d like to be in a position to take on the burden of seeing that your mother and father are cared for — ”
Herb laughed. “Relax, Uncle Ben,” he said. “I’m not going to ask you to support them. Go back to eating. I’ve got a plan that will enable me to keep right on selling.”
“Oh?” said Ben, brightening.
“That’s right,” said Herb. “Listen. I’m going to be in a camp with a thousand, ten thousand, I-don’t-know-how-many thousand men. What better place for me to sell — ”
He stopped himself, glanced at his aunt and at his young cousins. They were more attentive than ever before, the new imminence of death or dismemberment lending to Herb’s words a gravity and fascination they’d never had before.
“Sell books,” said Herb.
“Books?” asked Ben. He wore a look of surprise and incredulity.
“That’s right!” said Herb. “Those men are going to be lonely, isn’t that right, Uncle Ben?”
“Oh yes,” said Ben. “I’m certain they will be lonely. Frightened, too, I guess. Lonely and frightened. Mostly frightened.”
“I see what Herb’s getting at,” said Louise. “All those lonely, frightened men. What would they want most?”
“Um, that’s exactly right,” said Herb. He turned toward Ben and risked a wink. “What is it that a man turns to to alleviate his loneliness and fear? What fire drives away the chill of fear and lights even the darkest and loneliest corners?”
“Literature!” shouted Ben. “By God, you’re right, Herb! It’s a brilliant stroke.”
“Well, uh, yes, I’m glad you think so, Uncle Ben,” said Herb. He looked at his aunt and his cousins. Their eyes had filled with tears inspired by Herb’s selflessness, his thinking of the fear and loneliness of his fellow doughboys, even as he must have anticipated his own loneliness, his own fear.
“I don’t see how we can miss,” said Ben. He threw his arm across Herb’s shoulders and drew him close. “I don’t want you telling anyone else about this, Herb,” he said. “We can do this all on our own. Who needs Professor Clapp? Besides, we’re going to want to pick our books especially for the young man in the trenches or on his way to the trenches, the young man about to look death in the teeth. Oh, sorry, Herb. You know what I mean. Those doughboys aren’t going to want to waste their time on Practical Poultry Keeping. They’re going to want stuff like, well, the Aeneid and Julius Caesar and Gulliver’s Travels. Twelve books, twelve great books. The Doughboy’s Dozen. We’ll sell subscriptions to the folks at home and ship the books to their boys on the front lines. The same one-book-every-month idea!”
Later, when they managed to speak alone, Ben said, “I know what you have in mind, Herb, but I’m not sure we can ship something like that to France. I think the army checks packages and letters. The goods would never reach the boys.”
“I know, Uncle Ben,” said Herb. “That’s why I’ve got to take a supply with me, a large supply. I’m sure I can sell everything I can take, but I imagine that I’ll be moving around a lot, so I probably won’t be able to take much. I don’t know how much I can afford to buy all at once, though. I’ll bet I could get a better price if I could get some pieces without buying through the Professor Clapp people. Can I go right to the people who make the goods?”
“Of course you can!” said Ben. “They’re in New York somewhere, not too far from Albany, I think. What’s it called, now? Chack–? Check–? Chacallit. That’s it. I’ll go with you! It should be quite an adventure.”
[to be continued on Wednesday, May 25, 2022]
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In Topical Guide 266, Mark Dorset considers Literature: Its Value and Utility and Real Reality, Fictional Reality from this episode.
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