The Personal History, Adventures, Experiences & Observations of Peter Leroy
The Personal History, Adventures, Experiences & Observations of Peter Leroy
šŸŽ§ 380: Then I threw ...
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šŸŽ§ 380: Then I threw ...

Herb ā€™nā€™ Lorna, Chapter 18 begins, read by the author
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In Which Herb and Lorna Are Saved by the Art of Love

THEN I THREW A PARTY at Herb and Lornaā€™s house, and at that party Mark Dorset fell in love with the Glynn twins, and, therefore, everything turned out all right, eventually.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā I had grown up while Studebaker had declined, and at about the time when the Avanti and the first transistorized electronic calculators appeared, I met the love of my life, a girl named Albertine, an exotic, beautiful, intriguing girl, of whom I spoke to my friends so often and in such tedious detail that they had begun to sidle off when they saw me approaching, slinking off to the grease pit so that they wouldnā€™t have to hear about her again. None of my friends knew her, since she went to a private school and lived on the east side of the Bolotomy River, in a part of Babbington separate from the rest of the town, a remote and unfamiliar region, a place unto itself. I wanted Albertine to meet my friends, and I wanted them to meet her. So I decided to throw a party. Like most people at sixteen, I was embarrassed by my parents, so I didnā€™t want to have the party at home. I wanted to have it at Herb and Lornaā€™s. They were delighted when I told them and consented at once.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Among the people I invited was Mark Dorset, a new friend, a newcomer to Babbington. He accepted, but with mixed feelings, since he was one of those high school students for whom a party meant, primarily, the possibility of romance, a possibility sweet in anticipation, but which too often vanished as soon as the party began.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā I knew how he felt. I had sometimes felt that way myself, before I met Albertine. In the hours before a party, while I was deciding what clothes, what look, what attitude to wear to this affair, the party as it might be would run through my mind again and again, a wonderful scampering thing, elusive and attractive, darting from possibility to possibility. With whom would I fall in love? Who would fall in love with me?
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ahhh, but the parties in fact never equaled the parties in anticipation. For a few early moments, really only the first few moments after I had walked through the door, the pleasure of possibility remained, but soon the possible began a slow dissolve into the actual, and toward the end of the evening the actual was likely to take a form something like this (and at one party it took a form exactly like this): the girl with whom I had fallen in love, to whom I had confided some of my most cherished hopes and dreams, who had listened so wide-eyed while I was confiding those hopes and dreams, whose wide eyes had inspired me to some quite spine-tingling turns of phrase, who had held my hand during the if-only-the-world-were-just part, who had kissed me quickly and shyly in the hall and again, slowly and thoroughly, while we sat on the porch, left suddenly (squeal of tires, smell of rubber, cloud of smoke) in a battered convertible driven by a guy who had quit school the year before and now installed linoleum flooring, left laughing, leaving me behind, grinning like an idiot to hide my disappointment that this girl for whom I had had such hopes, to whom I had said so much, could have fallen at the last minute for muscles and a ragtop.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Mark was often one of those people who were still hanging around after a party, when it was time to clean up, one of those who, having nothing better to do, would scramble around, trying to find all the bottles and glasses, trying to reconstruct vases, to wash beer stains from the rugs and upholstery, trying to hide from the parents any evidence that a party had been thrown in their house.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā The party I threw for Albertine was different. Mark came with small hopes, but it turned out to be a wonderful evening. He fell in love, doubly in love, with the Glynn twins, Margot and Martha. By the time Herb and Lorna returned home in the small hours, Mark was euphoric, happily befuddled, drunk on love, adolescent love. He was learning how pleasant desire could be, how unlike the desperate longing he had known, when it wasnā€™t hopeless, and he was experiencing a sweet torture from the feeling that he was going to have to choose between those identical beauties, that he couldnā€™t have them both. Better than all these feelings, though, was his feeling that Margot and Martha loved him. He could see in their eyes, in their grins (ā€œYou look like the Grin Twins,ā€ he said), that they werenā€™t going to run off in a convertible with a linoleum-installer, but would leave with him.

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The Personal History, Adventures, Experiences & Observations of Peter Leroy
šŸŽ§ 381: Mark was sitting ...
Listen now (6 min) | Mark was sitting on the living room sofa with his right arm around Margot and his left arm around Martha, when Herb and Lorna, who had come in through the kitchen, suddenly appeared in the archway between their dining room and their living room. His first impulse was to jump up and thank them, he felt such a rush of gratitude. He was grateful for tā€¦
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In Topical Guide 380, Mark Dorset considers Foreshadowing; Studebakers: The Avanti; Gadgets: Electronic Calculators; and Love: Young, Moonstruck, PerdurableĀ  from this episode.

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The Personal History, Adventures, Experiences & Observations of Peter Leroy
The Personal History, Adventures, Experiences & Observations of Peter Leroy
The entire Personal History, Adventures, Experiences & Observations of Peter Leroy, read by the author. "A masterpiece of American humor." Los Angeles Times