Topical Guide 922
Mark Dorset
Sleeplessness
Anxiety
Regret
Leaving Small’s Hotel, Chapter 17:
AT ABOUT THREE I gave up trying to get to sleep. […] I went downstairs and into the kitchen, where I made a turkey sandwich from the leftovers refrigerator. I took it out onto the porch, and I found Lou sitting there.
“Couldn’t sleep?” he asked.
“Couldn’t sleep,” I said. […]
“Was it anxieties or regrets?”
“Anxieties and regrets.”
William Makepeace Thackeray, Pendennis
Even in later days and with a great deal of care and other thoughtful matter to keep him awake, a man from long practice or fatigue or resolution begins by going to sleep as usual, and gets a nap in advance of Anxiety. But she soon comes up with him and jogs his shoulder, and says: “Come, my man, no more of this laziness; you must wake up and have a talk with me.” Then they fall together in the midnight.
Fernando Pessoa, as Bernardo Soares, The Book of Disquietude (translated by Richard Zenith):
If one day I were given a flash of expressive power so great that it concentrated all art in me, then I would write a eulogy to sleep. I know no greater pleasure in life than that of being able to sleep. The total extinguishing of life and the soul, the complete banishment of all beings and people, the night with neither memory nor illusion, the absence of past and future.
See also:
Anxiety for the Future TG 30, TG 126; Anxiety for the Unknown TG 126
Have you missed an episode or two or several?
You can begin reading at the beginning or you can catch up by visiting the archive or consulting the index to the Topical Guide. The Substack serialization of Little Follies begins here; Herb ’n’ Lorna begins here; Reservations Recommended begins here; Where Do You Stop? begins here; What a Piece of Work I Am begins here; At Home with the Glynns begins here; Leaving Small’s Hotel begins here.
You can listen to the episodes on the Personal History podcast. Begin at the beginning or scroll through the episodes to find what you’ve missed. The Substack podcast reading of Little Follies begins here; Herb ’n’ Lorna begins here; Reservations Recommended begins here; Where Do You Stop? begins here; What a Piece of Work I Am begins here; At Home with the Glynns begins here; Leaving Small’s Hotel begins here.
You can listen to “My Mother Takes a Tumble” and “Do Clams Bite?” complete and uninterrupted as audiobooks through YouTube.
You can ensure that you never miss a future issue by getting a free subscription. (You can help support the work by choosing a paid subscription instead.)
At Apple Books you can download free eBooks of Little Follies, Herb ’n’ Lorna, Reservations Recommended, Where Do You Stop?, What a Piece of Work I Am, and At Home with the Glynns.
You’ll find overviews of the entire work in An Introduction to The Personal History, Adventures, Experiences & Observations of Peter Leroy (a pdf document), The Origin Story (here on substack), Between the Lines (a video, here on Substack), and at Encyclopedia.com.